"Why won't you bitches help me?!?" The joy of labor in media...or not

We all know the formula for birth in movies and television-- the water breaks, everyone panics and rushes to the hospital, the woman screams at everyone around her (especially the father, if he's present), and the baby, usually looking like a  4-month old, is born within minutes. Those of us familiar with birth---whether from having children of our own, or supporting and attending to women in labor--know that real birth rarely follows this strict formula. I would love to see what a Hollywood producer would do with the birth of my first child--which took 36 hours from start to finish and didn't involve even one single taxi cab rushing anyone anywhere!

There is plenty of validity in critiques of the depiction of labor in the media. Children, teenagers, and even young adults are forming their ideas about pregnancy and birth based on these scenes in popular culture, scenes that tell girls that labor is nothing short of horrific, and demonstrates to birth partners that the only thing to do is stand there looking dumb or passing out. Women hoping for a natural birth are typically mocked and end up begging for drugs.

This treatment of labor affects us and our culture--it disempowers women and supports the sense that birth is a medical event that must be managed. At SQUAT, we're dedicated to publishing voices from the across the spectrum of birth experiences to demonstrate the pregnancy and birth can be beautiful, transformational, and empowering for women and families.

That said, these scenes are pretty funny. If you let yourself relax a little, they will make you laugh. So let's take a mid-week laugh break and look at some of the "best of" birth depictions compiled by the SQUAT t


Best Breaking Water: Amy Poehler and Tine Fey in Baby Mama. Complete with flood of water, mad-dash to the hospital, and angry screaming!

Angie's Water Breaks




Baby Mama

— MOVIECLIPS.com

Best Vagina Nick-Name: Dr. Bailey giving birth on Grey's Anatomy.



Best Squat: Comedienne Lauren Weedmen on Funnyordie.com, exploring labor positions and birth goo.

Our Bodies Myself: Childbirth - watch more funny videos

Best Music: Quinn has her baby on Glee. This clip's got it all--the rush to the hospital, yelling at the baby daddy, and... dancing! New York Times Magazine put it best, calling this "the most intense show choir/having a baby sequence in recent memory."




Best Pubic Hair: SNL's natural birth class, complete with a super-large VHS tape of a homebirth.



Best. Satire. Ever. : Monty Python. "What should I do?," asks the mother. "Nothing, my dear! You're not qualified!"